The Phoenix
Posted using ShareThis
8.08.2009
6.28.2009
Rough week in celeb-land
With no snarky comments from me, I offer my deepest condolences to the family and friends of:
Ed McMahon, March 6, 1923 - June 23, 2009
Farrah Fawcett, February 2, 1947 - June 25, 2009
Michael Jackson, August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009
Billy Mays II, July 20, 1958 - June 28, 2009
The world will miss the talent and entertainment of all of these fine people. RIP, dolls.
Ed McMahon, March 6, 1923 - June 23, 2009
Farrah Fawcett, February 2, 1947 - June 25, 2009
Michael Jackson, August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009
Billy Mays II, July 20, 1958 - June 28, 2009The world will miss the talent and entertainment of all of these fine people. RIP, dolls.
6.23.2009
Can you write better than Perez?
So, apparently all Perez Hilton is good at is drawing cum, coke and penises (peni? penis'? I'll stick with penises... haha now I've written it so many times it just looks funny...) on people's pictures. Because, he's certainly not good at writing. Seriously, did this guy get past third grade?
He issued this "updated statement" "from the heart" earlier today:
All you have to do is re-write this hot mess of Perez's, spice it up a little bit, put it in actual PARAGRAPHS and submit it to betsyblogs1@gmail.com
The best NEW work will win a mention on this website, have their "new statement" published here aaand... something else really cool that I haven't determined yet. But, it'll be good, I swear ;)
Deadline for the re-write is Friday, June 26, 2009 by midnight, EST. (I think that means Pennsylvania-time, but I'm no scientist...)
He issued this "updated statement" "from the heart" earlier today:
From the heart:
"Words can hurt. I know that very well, from both sides of the fence. The other night in Toronto, after feeling physically threatened by a verbally abusive Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas, I chose the most hurtful word I know to hurl at him. I was in an out-of-the ordinary situaton and used a word that I would not utter under normal circumstances. My intention - however misguided it may have been - was to stand up for myself and tell this belligerent man that I had enough of his badgering and was not going to continue to let him berate and intimidate me. I wanted to hurt him with the word I chose, not anyone else. Unfortunately, the one who got hurt was me and, subsequently, a lot of other people. I wish none of it had happened. I can't take it back. I did what I thought was best at the moment to stand up for myself in a non-violent yet still assertive way. Clearly, I am not homophobic. Also, I am not nor have I ever claimed to be a spokesperson for the gay community. I am just speaking for myself, a gay man. One who is labeled "flamboyant" in the media. An American that is not granted equal rights under the law. I will continue to speak out for equality and I will continue to say things that upset both gay people and straight people. Who I am as a person and what I do for a living are two separate things. I've come to terms with all my incongruities and am proud of who I am and what I do. In closing, words can hurt. But words should not provoke someone to violence. Stripped away from the mask of Perez Hilton, I have been extremely bothered by the public reaction to my assault. Violence should never be condoned with such statements as "It's Karma" or "I don't believe in violence but….". In fact, several television and radio shows over the past couple of days echoed the sentiment "He had it coming". Would they have said the same thing if I was a woman? Would I have "deserved it" if I had been stabbed? Or shot? Or killed? I was attacked from behind without warning and repeatedly punched in the head in a cold, disgusting and unnecessarily violent manner by Polo Molina, the road manager for the Black Eyed Peas, who I did not even speak with that evening. I did not share any words with him and his assault on me was completely unprovoked. I feel like everything happens for a reason and I leave this traumatic experience as a person with more compassion. Specifically, there was an instance last year when actor Jesse Metcalfe was attacked outside of a Hollywood nightclub by a fellow entertainer. I did not condone the violence, but I did make light of that situation. I regret that. Sincerely. There are many ways to deal with disagreements, both good and bad, but violence is never the answer. Never. I now know that first-hand. It should not be condoned, promoted or accepted. No one "deserves" to be the victim of violence. No one "has it coming." NO ONE. And victims should not be ridiculed. I look forward to marching for equality in Washington, D.C. this October. And I look forward to standing up for my rights in a Toronto courtroom shortly, as I fully intend to seek every lawful remedy against the man that attacked me."
- Perez Hilton
June 23, 2009
Los Angeles, California
All you have to do is re-write this hot mess of Perez's, spice it up a little bit, put it in actual PARAGRAPHS and submit it to betsyblogs1@gmail.com
The best NEW work will win a mention on this website, have their "new statement" published here aaand... something else really cool that I haven't determined yet. But, it'll be good, I swear ;)
Deadline for the re-write is Friday, June 26, 2009 by midnight, EST. (I think that means Pennsylvania-time, but I'm no scientist...)
I'm obsessed
Last night's episode of Jon and Kate Plus Eight brought in nearly 10.6 million viewers; almost a million more than the season premiere.
In case you missed it:
Jon spent the day with some crew installing "crooked houses" for the kids, not in the woods as he had planned, but closer to the house per Kate's demands.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Jon says Kate won't communicate with him, even though he tries.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Kate says Jon won't communicate with her, even though she tries.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Jon has pierced ears --?
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
They don't hate each other.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
They're divorcing.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Sob, sob, Jon's still young and needs to be free, Kate doesn't want to be alone and a statistic.
Did I mention it's all for the kids?
Rumor has it that the show's going on hiatus until August, cuz everyone knows that it'll only take a month and a half to get over the fact that they're divorcing. And, that's all the losses that TLC is willing to take on this goldmine of a family.
Seriously, ten bucks says that Maddy's involved in a sex scandal within the next ten years, and I'll give Joel fifteen til he's hooked on coke. In fact, I have to go, I'm putting together a care package for the Gosselin children...
"One night in Paris" ... check
Rolling papers ... check
Three crack pipes ... check, check, check
All of Lindsay Lohan's movies ... check
Kim Kardashian's false eyelashes ... check
Jenna Jameson's greatest hits ... check
In case you missed it:
Jon spent the day with some crew installing "crooked houses" for the kids, not in the woods as he had planned, but closer to the house per Kate's demands.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Jon says Kate won't communicate with him, even though he tries.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Kate says Jon won't communicate with her, even though she tries.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Jon has pierced ears --?
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
They don't hate each other.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
They're divorcing.
Everything Jon and Kate do, it's for the kids.
Sob, sob, Jon's still young and needs to be free, Kate doesn't want to be alone and a statistic.
Did I mention it's all for the kids?
Rumor has it that the show's going on hiatus until August, cuz everyone knows that it'll only take a month and a half to get over the fact that they're divorcing. And, that's all the losses that TLC is willing to take on this goldmine of a family.
Seriously, ten bucks says that Maddy's involved in a sex scandal within the next ten years, and I'll give Joel fifteen til he's hooked on coke. In fact, I have to go, I'm putting together a care package for the Gosselin children...
"One night in Paris" ... check
Rolling papers ... check
Three crack pipes ... check, check, check
All of Lindsay Lohan's movies ... check
Kim Kardashian's false eyelashes ... check
Jenna Jameson's greatest hits ... check
6.22.2009
Go Figure...
After admitting to beating the shit out of Rihanna, Chris Brown is walking with 1440 hours of community service.
Great.
Great.
Perez Hilton vs. Will.I.Am: Team Will
So, the gossip sites have been buzzing all day with Perez Hilton's whiny claims that he was beat up by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas.
Apparently, Perez told Willy "You're not an artist, you're a fucking faggot." I believe this means that he began the fight. Anyway, Perez said this, fists flew, and now Perez is really sad:
Really, I have no sympathy for Perez, because we all know that I can't stand him.
My theory? He wants to be the next Rhianna, now that her shit's finally clearing. Seriously, this guy will do anything for attention. Actually, I think that the superficial writer says it best:
"After a spectacle like this you have to wonder what's next for Perez Hilton. Which is why my money's on flashing his vagina while getting out of a car. Who wants in?"
Superficial, doll, put me down for $50.
Apparently, Perez told Willy "You're not an artist, you're a fucking faggot." I believe this means that he began the fight. Anyway, Perez said this, fists flew, and now Perez is really sad:
Really, I have no sympathy for Perez, because we all know that I can't stand him. My theory? He wants to be the next Rhianna, now that her shit's finally clearing. Seriously, this guy will do anything for attention. Actually, I think that the superficial writer says it best:
"After a spectacle like this you have to wonder what's next for Perez Hilton. Which is why my money's on flashing his vagina while getting out of a car. Who wants in?"
Superficial, doll, put me down for $50.
5.30.2009
...what is this?
What the heck is that robot-y thing and the crazy robot hatched egg? I question those zany people at twitter, sometimes.
Britain has more talent than America
I don't generally watch nonsense like America's Got Talent or Britain's got talent, because I'm so busy watching prestigious shows such as Jon and Kate plus eight, but a winner has been declared for Britain's Got Talent.
It came down to dance crew "Diversity" and spinster singer Susan Boyle. Diversity won. Check out their winning performance:
And here's Suzie B's final performance:
So... which do YOU think should have won?
It came down to dance crew "Diversity" and spinster singer Susan Boyle. Diversity won. Check out their winning performance:
And here's Suzie B's final performance:
So... which do YOU think should have won?
5.29.2009
Britt-Britt spends money
Just heard that Britney Spears spent ten million dollars in ten months.
Obviously, she hasn't heard the word "recession."
Seriously, who's controlling her cash? Someone take the debit card from the bipolar chick. For reals. Better yet, since I'm a soon-to-be-banker, send her my way. We'll chat about cash while she takes me out for Starbucks. Bonus points if she brings the babies with her, double bonus points if she doesn't mistake them for muffins and try to take a bite out of them. Yumpf.
Obviously, she hasn't heard the word "recession."
Seriously, who's controlling her cash? Someone take the debit card from the bipolar chick. For reals. Better yet, since I'm a soon-to-be-banker, send her my way. We'll chat about cash while she takes me out for Starbucks. Bonus points if she brings the babies with her, double bonus points if she doesn't mistake them for muffins and try to take a bite out of them. Yumpf.
Guess the Hogan
Which one is Linda? Which one is Brooke? Are they both images of one or the other? I have no idea. That's why I'm posting them. Because Brooke looks like she is 57 and Linda thinks she's 17.
Anyway, I guess the Hogan family is more effed up than I've cared to follow. If you're really interested in the scoop, and not analyzing the above photos, check out http://www.okmagazine.com/news/view/14509. But, you know that what you really want to do is analyze.
Angie takes a bump
Angelina Jolie took a bump to the head, started bleeding and was taken to the hospital earlier today. She was filming for her latest film, "Salt." She returned to set shortly after the incident.
Shouldn't she have a stunt double or something? Like, Octo-mom should be put in these dangerous situations, shouldn't she?
Yawn. What a boring post. See, I'm boring when I don't talk about Jon and Kate.
Shouldn't she have a stunt double or something? Like, Octo-mom should be put in these dangerous situations, shouldn't she?
Yawn. What a boring post. See, I'm boring when I don't talk about Jon and Kate.
Movie: Drag Me To Hell
I was dragged to see Drag Me To Hell (see what I did there..?) at midnight last night. Yes, that PG-13 movie actually had a midnight opening in theaters. Craaazy.
Anyway, okay, so I'm going to actually be a "grown up" on Tuesday, and am starting a job at a bank, and Drag Me To Hell? Yeah, not the movie to see if you're going to be working in a BANK.
Basically, little blonde chick has the perfect life... cute boyfriend Justin Long (ahhhh I love himmmmm), cute house, kitten, and is up for a promotion at her job at a bank. Then, she denies some freak lady an extension on a loan or something money-ish, and gets cursed.
I give director and writer Sam Raimi two thumbs up on this one, actually. Pretty sweet special effects, I jumped through the roof about nineteen times. Some of it was pretty corny, hence the PG-13 rating on it, but I guarantee that if you can sit through the corniness, the ending totally makes up for the entire movie.
Two very rare thumbs up from the Betsy Skotch.
Anyway, okay, so I'm going to actually be a "grown up" on Tuesday, and am starting a job at a bank, and Drag Me To Hell? Yeah, not the movie to see if you're going to be working in a BANK.
Basically, little blonde chick has the perfect life... cute boyfriend Justin Long (ahhhh I love himmmmm), cute house, kitten, and is up for a promotion at her job at a bank. Then, she denies some freak lady an extension on a loan or something money-ish, and gets cursed.
I give director and writer Sam Raimi two thumbs up on this one, actually. Pretty sweet special effects, I jumped through the roof about nineteen times. Some of it was pretty corny, hence the PG-13 rating on it, but I guarantee that if you can sit through the corniness, the ending totally makes up for the entire movie.
Two very rare thumbs up from the Betsy Skotch.
Another Jon and Kate post
I swear, I'm completely obsessed with becoming Kate Gosselin. I mean, now that I've got the Kate haircut, I'm trying to convince my boyfriend to get the Jon haircut. (He totally needs a haircut.)
Anyway, this one totally flew under my radar for some reason (I was too busy watching What Not To Wear cuz TLC was failing me on the Jon and Kate front...) but kudos to @dinaondria for throwing this tip my way...
According to People Magazine, Jon & Kate are now being investigated for a child labor complaint. People says:
"I can confirm that our bureau of labor law compliance is conducting an investigation as they do whenever they receive a charge," said Christopher Manlove, a spokesman for the Pennsylvania Department of Labor and Industry.
Because the investigation is still going on, they won't say who filed the complaint, but, I mean, c'mon, it's totally Kevin and Jodi. They're pissed that Jon and Kate get all the media attention, they've gotten a taste of it themselves this past week (seriously, every time I'm flipping through the channels to get to TLC and I hit a news station, the two of them are on.) they want the attention on them.
Anyway, TLC says: "TLC fully complies with all applicable laws and regulations. Jon and Kate + 8 is no exception. For an extended period of time, we have been engaged in cooperative discussions and supplied all requested information to the Pennsylvania Department of Labor. We will continue to engage the appropriate officials and meet any standards or regulations that are applicable to TLC productions."
Psht. Yeah right. I know how the biz goes, and as long as these eight kids are still making them money, labor laws, what?
Anyway, this one totally flew under my radar for some reason (I was too busy watching What Not To Wear cuz TLC was failing me on the Jon and Kate front...) but kudos to @dinaondria for throwing this tip my way...
According to People Magazine, Jon & Kate are now being investigated for a child labor complaint. People says:
"I can confirm that our bureau of labor law compliance is conducting an investigation as they do whenever they receive a charge," said Christopher Manlove, a spokesman for the Pennsylvania Department of Labor and Industry.
Because the investigation is still going on, they won't say who filed the complaint, but, I mean, c'mon, it's totally Kevin and Jodi. They're pissed that Jon and Kate get all the media attention, they've gotten a taste of it themselves this past week (seriously, every time I'm flipping through the channels to get to TLC and I hit a news station, the two of them are on.) they want the attention on them.
Anyway, TLC says: "TLC fully complies with all applicable laws and regulations. Jon and Kate + 8 is no exception. For an extended period of time, we have been engaged in cooperative discussions and supplied all requested information to the Pennsylvania Department of Labor. We will continue to engage the appropriate officials and meet any standards or regulations that are applicable to TLC productions."
Psht. Yeah right. I know how the biz goes, and as long as these eight kids are still making them money, labor laws, what?
5.26.2009
New Jon and Kate
Jon and Kate plus eight are totally over. And TLC has found just the couple to replace them! The new show will be called...
...ready for this...?
...Mel and Oksana plus eight!
Doesn't it have a great ring to it?
Okay, actually, these two stories have NOTHING to do with one another, I'm just pretty obsessed with Jon and Kate plus eight right now.
Really, Mel Gibson admitted to Jay Leno last night that girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva is pregnant with Gibson's eighth child. So, I just figured that I'd be helpful to TLC and give them a new show.
That's right, TLC. Feel free to hire me and my brilliant ideas at any time. I'm college educated.
Anyway, if you're interested in babbling, check out the video. I didn't actually watch it before posting, so I'm just gonna go ahead and assume that Gibson's talking about his new deal with TLC since they apparently like to put large families with cheating husbands on TV. Watch at your own discretion.
data="http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/4a1c5b8bad79e7b4/4a1be6d998251400/fabc7c63/
...ready for this...?
...Mel and Oksana plus eight!
Doesn't it have a great ring to it?
Okay, actually, these two stories have NOTHING to do with one another, I'm just pretty obsessed with Jon and Kate plus eight right now.
Really, Mel Gibson admitted to Jay Leno last night that girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva is pregnant with Gibson's eighth child. So, I just figured that I'd be helpful to TLC and give them a new show.
That's right, TLC. Feel free to hire me and my brilliant ideas at any time. I'm college educated.
Anyway, if you're interested in babbling, check out the video. I didn't actually watch it before posting, so I'm just gonna go ahead and assume that Gibson's talking about his new deal with TLC since they apparently like to put large families with cheating husbands on TV. Watch at your own discretion.
data="http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/4a1c5b8bad79e7b4/4a1be6d998251400/fabc7c63/
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